golden years

On the 7th my son turned 7.

The following day made 17 years since my dad passed.

I've been trying to find this old picture I love.

I only found 1/2.

I was sure it was around here somewhere. At one point I even had the old polaroid.

What happened?

Where did it all go?

I hope it's not lost.

That would be really sad.

To lose something for good.

Gone.

Once I found this old t-shirt on the floor of my attic when I was in high school.

I wore it without even washing it first.

Our attic was unfinished. High up in an old well built house.

High up on a hill too, and man, that hill was a bitch to mow.

It used to get real hot up there in the summer.

That smell.

We had bats in our attic. And a beat up pool table. My older brother used to have his friends over to hang out.

They didn't like me up there with them.

So I faced my fears and snuck up when I was alone.

It was cool, mysterious, and we could see the fireworks from the front window on the 4th.

That t-shirt was a treasure.

My dad's.

From Gilley's in Pasadena.

It still fits like a glove. I wish they still made t-shirts like that. It's gotta be 50 years old.

I lost a box of t-shirts too.

Ones I'd been lovingly lugging around in my travels. The classics I collected since middle school.

Man I miss them.

My first basketball team. That worn to shreads sea green shirt from the crab shack in Florida. The eco-marathon one from Denmark. My dad's Larry Bird.

So many favorites.

All gone.

The person I was then.

The life I was living.

And now my son asks about him. Tells me he's sad that he's gone.

Me too dude.

What a gift.

This life.

We never know how long we have.

But right here, right now, for me, it's golden.

I'm trying to reflect that, in light of all the loss.

How we've been lost.

And all our treasures too.

It sparkles in the light.

The opportunities we have.

The life we give.

Golden.

I'm doing my best to keep that flame lit.

Put the pictures on our walls.

Tell the stories.

He always said not to 1/2 ass things.

And don't be afraid to get your hands dirty.

Less perfect, more play.

I'm starting to grow out of my old shirts, but his still fit.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *